Articles
As Yourself
“You shall not hate your brother in your heart, but you shall reason frankly with your neighbor, lest you incur sin because of him. You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the LORD.” (Lev 19:17-18)
“Love your neighbor as yourself” is one of the most quoted OT verses in the NT (Matt 5:43; 19:19; 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Rom 13:9; Gal 5:14; James 2:8). Jesus referred to it as the second greatest of the commands (Matt 22:39; Mark 12:31). It is the fulfillment of the law. It is the summation of all commandments. But what does “as yourself” mean?
Some have read Lev 19:18 as an implicit command to love ourselves. The claim is that we really can’t love our neighbor until we have first learned to love ourselves. But this interpretation is actually quite dangerous, and in many ways subverts the intended meaning of the command. The entire point of Lev 19:18 is to make love “other-focused.” Love, by definition, means putting other people ahead of ourselves and behaving selflessly towards them. If the first thing we see while reading this text is a command to say, “Hey! Love yourself!” we are missing the point. Barring extremely rare exceptions, most people have no real trouble loving themselves! The Bible nowhere commands self-love because most folks are pretty good at it. The logic of Lev 19:18 is essentially, “Okay, since you know how to love yourself, you need to apply that same love to other people.”
What does this self love look like? And how can we apply that self-love to others?
Most people, when telling a story about a conflict between themselves and others, will paint themselves in the best possible light. They don’t want to be the bad guy in their own stories! That’s a form of self-love. If we love our neighbor as ourselves, we will also paint our neighbor in that same kind of best possible light.
Most people, when they lash out angrily at others, have a justifiable reason (in their mind) for being angry. Their anger is righteous anger according to them. That’s a form of self-love too. If we love our neighbor as ourselves, we will look for similar justifications when our neighbor is angry before writing them off as irate.
Most people love being celebrated and complimented by others. They want their achievements recognized and their accomplishments credited. This is a form of self-love. If we love our neighbor as ourselves, we will celebrate and credit them in equal fashion.
Most people, when they are late, or when they fail to deliver on a promise, or when they drop the ball on an assignment, have an excuse for why this happened that is perfectly fair in their own mind. That’s a form of self-love. If we love our neighbor as ourselves, we will be willing to treat their excuses in an equally “fair” fashion.
All people live with character flaws. Most people are still willing to live with themselves in spite of these character flaws. They are willing to “tolerate” these flaws in themselves (even if they acknowledge that they want to change and work on them). That tolerant “benefit of the doubt” is yet again a form of self-love. If we love our neighbor as ourselves, we will be willing to live with similar character flaws in others.
Many people also believe that wrongdoing should be called out for what it is. Sin should be called sin. Evil should be called evil. Wicked behavior should be exposed and consequences dealt out. This belief that wickedness in others should be confronted is actually also a form of self-love, since it calls for a removal of said wickedness and a validation of one’s own moral worldview. If we love our neighbor as ourselves, we will be equally critical of wickedness and sin in our own lives.
There are many other ways that we love ourselves—forgiving ourselves, respecting ourselves, justifying ourselves, etc. If we love our neighbor as ourselves, we will not be hypocrites, but will extend this same forgiveness, respect, and justification to others. May God help us to fulfill this great command, and thereby fulfill the law!
